016: I Got Called Out
I got called out.
I woke up this morning to a message from a mentor asking me why I had strayed from a plan that was offered, and that I had wholeheartedly agreed to.
I’m a bit of a rebel and I’ve always had a tendency to go “my own way”.
Lone Wolf in the worst of ways.
And yet I’ve learned over time that this isn’t necessarily the best way to find success.
It will take you far. You’ll have some epic wins.
But we all need support to help us see our blind spots, and to provide a mirror of reflection when we can’t see beyond our limited viewpoint.
We win together.
So I thought about it …why did I go my own way as it relates to this particular thing?
Well, it turns out that when things feel particularly scary, or uncertain, that’s when I’m most likely to want to exercise personal control and metaphorically “take the wheel”.
And sometimes that’s warranted.
But this becomes a problem when you’ve consciously made a plan, found the right support structures, and at the first sign of either fear or boredom, default back to your “usual” way of doing things.
I knew that going my own way wasn’t going to work in this case, and yet I did it anyway.
I see this happen all the time in the business coaching / marketing space.
I’ve also been guilty of it.
People like to pick and choose what advice they are going to follow like they are in the buffet line at a Vegas hotel.
They’ll say “I’ll do this, this fits me and my business well”, and then at the very next suggestion offered they’ll say “no thanks, that doesn’t feel comfortable”.
Maybe not with their words, but with their actions.
And so they’ll hobble together a new “me system” that’s something akin to a patchwork quilt made up of all the easy to digest pieces of many different strategies and systems – and in the process deflate the full potential of each component.
This is part of the reason you see so much hopping around between business coaches, mentors, coaching programs, etc. It’s easy to throw up your hands and say “well that didn’t work”, but if you are really honest with yourself, have you ever really followed 100% of the guidance to a tee?
And YES, the coach or mentor has a responsibility to skillfully teach, articulate solutions well, and offer support …but how often do we point the finger in their direction first and say they fell short on their promise, versus looking deeply at what our part was in the unfolding of a particular result?
If we desire to get a different result in our business or our life, we must take responsibility for that.
And what about innovation?
I’m a HUGE fan of creating something new, but first you’ve got to nail the fundamentals, and understand things fully before you start to create your own recipes, otherwise you again run the risk of diluting the power behind any chosen strategy.
I’m feeling a bit preachy here.
You may disagree with me and that’s OK.
To be 100% honest, all I’m really doing is simply parroting back my own advice to self that I needed to hear this week.
The challenge I’m reflecting on isn’t in the business space, however it’s interesting to notice that there are many parallels that show up in the various arenas of our life.
There is one strong antidote I’ve found to grabbing the wheel and finding myself back in “GOT THIS” mode, when I clearly don’t “have it”; and that is surrounding myself with a powerful crew of allies, supporters, and mentors who can call me out when I’m off the rails, cheer me on when I’m pushing through life’s challenges, and celebrate my victories when things go well.
I’m so grateful to have learned this early on and to be fortunate enough to have these support structures in my life.
Sending love and appreciation today as we approach the weekend.
May you find the support that you need to realize your creative expressions, and bring your greatest gifts to the world.
p.s. – it goes without saying to exercise discernment as to where you seek advice, and to trust your own internal guidance system.
I’m in no way advocating for un-earned blind faith 🙂
Here’s What I Want to Share This Week:
- Tuesday is the last day to secure a charter membership to CTC Circle.
we’ve gone “all in” on building a community of merit-based generosity.
Which is a fancy word for saying; we want to do everything we can to help elevate the reach, visibility, and yea — sales -— of those who are doing badass work in their respective spaces.
What that might look like, is finding a space where it’s safe to ask (and easy to find) someone to:
1. Beta test your new offer, workshop or program
2. Drop some review love on your new book or podcast
3. Find dream collaborators and JV partners who truly believe
in your stuff and want to share it (not just partaking in a high
school popularity contest a la Mean Girls – the marketing
What might that be worth?
Could be anywhere between zero and incalculable.
And it all depends on what you make of it.
️ Use the Code MAGIC at Checkout ️
Lock in your charter membership here (and cancel anytime things don’t feel quite right).
2. We’re moving ALL of our course stacks into Circle in the coming weeks
If you’ve ever purchased a training from Ry and I, keep an eye out for an email or two from Circle over the next week. And if you’d like to get access to your purchases in the new environment sooner than later, feel free to reply to this email.
3. Follow the Official CTC Circle Twitter List
I’m biased for sure, but consider following some of the smartest minds in the online coaching and course space on our official CTC Circle Twitter List.
Who We are Celebrating This Week: Matt Brown
Matt Brown is one of 3 amazing CTC Mentors helping to support the launch of our new community, and I couldn’t be more excited to introduce him to those of you that don’t know of him and his work.
Matt would describe himself as a full-stack conversion specialist with a love for helping coaches, course creators, and mission driven entrepreneurs grow their businesses with powerful messaging and smart systems.
Oh, and he’s our resident tea expert that I’ve been known to lean on heavily for advice when going through one of my “quit coffee” phases that seems to occur every few months .
But in all seriousness, Matt was a member of our first Cohort of Automated Intimacy and really took the training seriously, executing like a machine to learn the systems inside and out. So much so that we ended up working together 1:1 for a bit, and he’s become one of a VERY short list of full-stack individuals I feel comfortable recommending to clients and colleagues when I’ve been at full capacity for larger projects.
The feedback always seems to come back “oh my god, hiring Matt was the best thing I’ve done this year for my business”. So yeah – I couldn’t have been more delighted when Matt answered the call to join the team for CTC Circle.
His genuine love for helping people shines through, helping to hold Ry, myself, and the whole team to a higher standard.
This Week’s Curiosities :
Database of Tweet Prompts (link)
p.s. ready to schedule some tweets? Use Hypefury.
Easy Fast Image Editing with BrandBird (Link)
Brandbird turns your screenshots into captivating graphics aligned with your branding to helpyou boost your social media reach and engagement.
I’m going to start using this for my screenshots in this newsletter, as well as on Twitter.
Check it out if you want a quick and easy way to make things just a bit more polished with minimal effort.
I’m currently looking at ways to make our upcoming CTC Circle calls more engaging in the long-run, and recently stumbled across this tool.
Mentimeter is described as a presentation tool that uses quizzes, polls and word clouds to help engage students better in education
Skiff Mail is end-to-end encrypted email that protects your inbox and gives you the power to communicate freely.
I’ve already been using ProtonMail for my personal email (can’t give up GSuite for biz just yet).
That being said, this looks like a compelling offer, and I love the tie-in with Metamask for your login.
They have some pretty heavyweight advisors behind them (CTO of Signal for example).
If you haven’t already made the jump to a more privatized email solution away from big tech, this might be worth a look.
“Being willing to help others is the antidote to fear. And that is the first step toward becoming bulletproof” – Evy Poumpouras
Check It Out On Twitter 👇👇
Come join the conversation on Twitter, it’s much more fun with friends.